What is Love?


We thought we had it all figured out. We have read books, we have seen movies. We know what perfect love is supposed to be like. We know what a perfect partner should feel like; being completely in sync with each other, finishing each other’s sentences, understanding the silences. We thought we were ready for when it happened to us. We knew we would be. We had waited long enough.

But then, someone came along and we began questioning the same engraved-in-stone notion about perfect love. It wasn’t like that. It was real and subtle; the key word being REAL. It was no fierce declaration of love being shouted from mountain-tops. It was an all consuming feeling of being happy.

If the butterfly in the stomachs was love then what is this; pasted smile on the face 24X7, constant state of dreaming, satisfaction?

You will never know what love is supposed to feel like, until you fall head over heels in it!!

Believe. That is all it takes.


Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.’ We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Marianne Williamson

A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”, Ch. 7, Section 3 (1992)

On Being Alone


Meredith: There’s a reason I said I’d be happy alone. It wasn’t ’cause I thought I’d be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. It’s easier to be alone, because what if you learn that you need love and you don’t have it? What if you like it and lean on it? What if you shape your life around it and then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It’s like dying. The only difference is death ends. This? It could go on forever.

The times we should’ve been alone: all those times we have held on because we were afraid to be alone, all those times we’ve not let go because we wanted the other person to realize how much we love them and hope that they see that love, all those times when we’ve given it our everything even when there is no love anymore because we thought that this was it and all those times we’ve carried on because giving up when things were hard didn’t seem right.

For all those times when we didn’t give up and held on, we shouldn’t have. Because we can never make someone love us back, or make them see our love hoping they’d stay or even make someone see what we see; because at the end of the day, even when you’re in love with someone, you’re still alone. There will be times when you’ll curl up in bed alone after you’ve fought the world, when you’ll have coffee alone on the window sill tracing the rain drops, when you’ll fight your nightmares alone with no one to hold you in the dark.

So the most important thing in this world, the greatest achievement of your life will be the day you learn to live alone, and not in the sad tragic kind of way. In the way, that you realize, that it’s always you for yourself and that it’s not good to depend on companionship to get through life. No doubt you’ll need it, but when you don’t have it, don’t let it take you down.

The pain of breaking up with someone is crippling. It leaves a hollowness inside, a crumble when you want to be held in those arms, when all you need is to hear their voice. The thought of separation is the greatest sign of desperation that makes us want to stay put in the same place and time. But that will pass. The pain, the hurt, the misery- inducing memories, all of that, will pass. The pain will become a sweet ache of the past, an ache associated with all memories. Like you learnt to live again in the past, you’ll learn it again.

Being alone is not sad. It’s not a sign of unhappiness or depression or even escapism. It shows how comfortable you’re living with yourself. Because if you don’t know how to live with yourself, how can you ever expect someone else to live with you. Learn to be alone with your thoughts. We often associate loneliness with sadness. But there is a subtle difference between being lonesome and being alone. Being alone doesn’t necessitate that you’re sad, but being lonely sure does.

Don’t shut out the world to be alone, don’t stop loving or going out or being vulnerable. Do all of that. But make sure that when everything else is gone, and the night falls, you’re happy even left to your own self, that you enjoy staying with you.

Language… has created the word “loneliness” to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word “solitude” to express the glory of being alone.

-Paul Tillich

Untitled.


‘Look, there, that way!’

‘Where?’ Asked, she.

‘Oh come on! Can’t you see, that’s him!!!’

‘There is no one there’, she sighed.

Obviously there is no one.

He moves like Flash.

He is here one instant, gone the next.

His mind ever- wandering.

I have tried asking him where he goes away to?

His hideout in a hideous world.

But he doesn’t answer.

I think, maybe he is going away again.

But wait, I just reached you, David!

Don’t you go away again.

He looks away.

‘I wish I could stay. Give you everything, my love.

But you don’t understand.

I need alone. I will find my way back to you’, he says.

‘I’ll wait,’ I shout after him.

I can see him walk away.

Old t-shirt, its print faded.

Dark blue ripped denims.

Big- foot sneakers.

See him walk away into the sun.

Makes you almost wish that he turns around.

That he run back to you, hold you.

And say, ‘tie me to you.’

But he won’t. He can’t.

‘Let him go’, I hear her say.

‘But don’t you understand, I love him.

How can I let him go?’

‘Because he doesn’t belong to you’, she said.

Diu Calling


I had a recent trip to Diu, to be precise in December last year. It was a road trip after a really long time. And I utterly enjoyed it.

Diu is a good 261 odd kms from Rajkot, Gujarat. And the road after Somnath, takes a toll for the worse. It gets narrower and bumpy, therefore a distance that should technically take you a decent 1.5 hrs, takes up a close 2-2.5 hrs because of the road condition.

On the way to Diu, lies Somnath. It is the very temple that Mohammad Ghazni raided in 1024 CE. Now the temple is part of a large complex of temples built by the Gujarat Tourism. It sits on the lands end with the Arabian Sea washing its shores.

Diu on the other hand is a peaceful and serene fishing town. It is not over- exploited like other beach towns in India, like Goa or even Daman closer home. It is got a soothing feeling to it with empty roads, laid back people, french style houses and beaches. This is usually the scenario until and unless it’s a weekend or the Island Festival is going on, which is usually held in the month of december every year.

It is an amalgamation of three beaches- Nagoa beach, Jalandhar beach and Ghoghla beach. Where Nagao beach is the much preferred tourist destination with water sports and the likes, the other two have been pretty much left unexplored. Diu Fort is a beautiful and imposing structure with a huge light house and several old cannons. Outside the walls of the Diu Fort lies the Naida caves. The caves were a surprise since not alot of tourists know about. It surely is the most beautiful things, by far, in Diu.

Diu is best self- explored without the hassles of a guide. To get to know the place, the best is to hire a car and drive around town and explore. There is plenty there to be discovered.

Views of a Graduating Student


I was asked to write an article by the same name for my college magazine. My views as I leave college in a couple of months.

It was a difficult task writing that article. To begin with I didn’t really know what my view as graduating student should be. Should it be nostalgic about the last 3 years? Or should it be blatant and truthful? Was I supposed to write how much I will miss college and my life here? Or was I supposed to say that thank you for the education, but, seriously, I can’t wait to get out of college? What was I supposed to say? That what would be diplomatically correct but that would also make sure I was not a “sell-out”?

With all these questions in mind, I did manage to write, though after alot of anxiety attacks because the feeling of leaving this place hadn’t settled in then and still, to an extent, hasn’t.

So I am putting up the article, in original words, as submitted to the editorial team, for further criticism.

I have had a lot of “views” about my past, my present and my future as a college student. In the last three years, I have messed up and I have seen other people mess up. I have seen ordinary people achieve extraordinary feats. I have wished for things to change but never worked hard enough to be part of the change. I have criticized the college, but never tried to help change the very things. I have given up hope. I have lost friends. I have failed. But through all of this, I have learnt lessons. And because I don’t really know what my ‘View as a Graduating Student’ should be, I am going to share the very things that Pune and college have taught me. So, if you don’t mind reading and are someone who likes listening to what other people have to say, read on…

Go stick your finger into a power socket and switch it on. What is your first reaction? Ouch! That pretty much sums up what college is. It is quick and it’s a shock. To deal with college you have to be firmly grounded in your beliefs and you have to be smart. If you don’t really believe in anything, you will mess up. And if you’re not smart, you may just end up going through it again.

You’re sure to have made a lot of mistakes in the past years of college. Learn from them. Don’t go sticking every finger into the power socket. And if you also happen to be smart, learn from your neighbour’s burning hair.

Make your beliefs your virtues. Live by them; because it is very easy to become a man without principles who drifts along. You have to believe in something – gut, karma, destiny, anything. Don’t become the pebble that follows the course of the river. Become the boulder that changes its course. You’ll find plenty of opportunities to slip, to do wrong. Be a brave man and not give in. But also, don’t let your beliefs be rigid, change them with time as you go along. Adapt. I have seen a lot of people slip the past few years and become people they never intended becoming. Probably the biggest challenge that lies ahead of you is not getting lost amongst the crowd. Be an individual with an identity and a belief that is yours and yours alone.

Don’t put too much importance on your results. They are more of secondary deciding factors than the primary. The primary factor will always be you! Your college exams, CAT and all the other entrance exams that are calling out to you, will ever only prove the fact that you have brains and that you can use them. They were never a measure of success. So don’t lean on them heavily. Your success will depend on the person you are. Where you come from, what you studied, who your friends were won’t dictate who you become. What you are, surely will.

One of the most interesting back stories of the modern computing and IT industry is how many of its pioneers were college dropouts. Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg, for example, both left Harvard in mid-term and one of Gates’s proudest boasts is that he was responsible for persuading Steve Ballmer (now Microsoft’s CEO) to drop out of Stanford. The list continues with Larry Ellison, founder of Oracle and Michael Dell, founder of the computer firm that bears his name. And although Google’s co-founders, Sergey Brin and Larry Page, did graduate, they both dropped out of their PhD programmes. This rather runs against the conventional narrative – that an expensive college education and a good degree are essential prerequisites for success.

“The IQ test was invented to predict academic performance, nothing else. If we wanted something that would predict life success, we’d have to invent another test completely.”

– Robert Zajonc

Have ambitions in life. Have goals. They will lead you. Aspire to become something. I am not asking you to be all figured out in life. But for now know what you want. Atleast you’ll be doing something that you believe in and not following blindly in the footsteps of others. Don’t ever allow yourself to be pushed into doing something.

Don’t give up hope too easy. Life always comes around with better things. The lows in life will teach you to enjoy the happy moments. They’ll teach you to live life by the minute. And also, don’t take life very seriously. Find the humor in it. Smile a lot, even when things are down and out.

“Life goes by so fast, that if you don’t stop and look around, you might miss it.”

– From the film Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

Remember your friends and stay in touch. They are the very people you’ll be meeting in board rooms from now on. Keep them close. You never know when you may need them for blood transfusions or insider information.

In the end as the last 3 years conclude, old inhibitions have eroded, aspirations have changed, new habits have been formed, people have grown up and lessons have been learnt. For the future, remember:

Exercise, be healthy, it will go a long way. Drink, but don’t drink too much. And never drink and drive. Learn from the number of accidents you and your friends have had the last couple of years. Give up smoking. It was never good to begin with. Control your anger. Getting worked up never helped anyone. Manage your stress. Stick to deadlines. Start work early and not at the last minute. Become responsible. Enjoy life and live the moment. Life is too short to be spent on reading articles. Go write your own.

Remember this doesn’t end here. It is only the beginning, ‘for you and I shall meet again’, most probably in board room battles (!). Let’s move on with our lives. We have to write whole new chapters. Class of 2012, let’s graduate!!!


Much Love:

Class of 2009